ooowwww... TMI alert

I think I'm going quite insane.

I've been getting steadily worse menstrual cramps lately, presumably from the fibroid. When I saw the gyne back in December, he kept asking me if I was experiencing inordinate pain and I kept telling him I wasn't, much to his puzzlement. I really hadn't noticed anything out of the ordinary - I've always had pretty good periods, not much pain, just some discomfort like somebody pressing on my abdomen and back. Most of the time I don't even notice it until it's been going on for quite a while, at which point I go, "Oh! That must be my period." This is partly because I'm just not a terribly observant person and partly because the cramps just aren't that bad most of the time. I only just discovered the joy of Midol in the last year or so, and a lot of the time Chris has to remind me to take them.

Anyway. The gyne back in December was kind of skeptical that with one fibroid the size of a grapefruit, another the size of a tangerine, and several smaller ones, I wasn't experiencing inordinate pain. But that's what I told him. Chris disagreed - he said he'd noticed me complaining a bit more in recent months. But if there was an increase in pain, it was small enough that I hadn't noticed.

Well, I'm noticing now. I didn't notice anything out of the ordinary today during the day or at my soccer game - slight cramps, no big deal. Went out to Gracie O'Malley's with the team after the game and still nothing too bad. Came back, geeked a bit, went to bed, and started to notice. It got steadily worse until I gave in and took a couple of Midols. Then took some Advil. Chris rubbed my stomach and back a bit, we watched H:LOTS, and I went to sleep, in severe pain but still within reasonable limits.

Woke up about half an hour ago from the pain, and I'm going nuts. Now I've taken codeine, walked around, tried to lie down in different positions, etc etc etc... and it's getting steadily worse. It actually feels like labour pains - not severe ones yet, but steady, with no break between. I'm starting to wonder if I should go to Emerg. Pain severe enough to cut through sleep, two Midols and two Advils and 100mg amitryptilene is pretty bad. Especially the amitryptilene - I've been taking it at 10mg for a long time for the sleeping meds benefits, and it usually knocks me out at that dosage. Since last week I've been slowly increasing to anti-depressant level (150mg) and now I'm at 10x what I was before... and can't get to sleep, the pain is so bad.

Shit. This hurts.

But I'm Feeling Much Better Now...

Thanks for the good wishes, bear and snarkhunter :)

Finally went to sleep last night around 4:30am. So I'm pretty tired. But the gutwrenching pain is gone and oh, my, yes, I'm calling for appointments with either gyne or family doc - appts closer than August 29th and August 14th, respectively, which is when I'm scheduled to see them. And if they can't see me, I'll go to a walk-in clinic or Emerg. Not willing to go through another night like last night.

Spent this morning with the kibbles, painting and reading. Then dropped them off at the sitter's and went to Chris' neuropsych person to talk about his brain injury and its impact on him and us. It's funny - she apologized that she wasn't giving me much hopeful information, and on the surface what she was saying was pretty grim, but overall I found it very helpful. The problems feel more manageable once they're identified, especially since apparently many of the things that are hardest to deal with are, in her opinion, caused by the stress of the job. And, again in her opinion, should get better with time after he finishes his residency and does some more work to figure out ways of compensating for memory lapses and personality changes.

It's a bit of hope, anyway.

Must go pick up children and get on the phone to doctor-type persons now.