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A Thousand Pardons
Nov. 20th, 2004 09:16 amSo I'm working on my ADR article annotation, which is on What it Means to be Sorry: The Power of Apology in Mediation. The article starts like this:
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Rev. John Plummer was a pilot in Vietnam who called for an air strike on the village of Trang Bang. Twice, before acting, he was assured there were no civilians in the area. Later, he saw the Pulitzer prize-winning photo of nine-year-old Phan Thi Kim Phuc running from Trang Bang naked and horribly burned by napalm, and was tortured by "the realization that it was I who was responsible for her injuries."
Years of torment ensued as he silently endured his guilt, finding no way to express his remorse. Then he saw a story that the girl was living in Toronto and would attend a Veterans Day observance at the Vietnam Veterans Memorial in Washington. He felt compelled to see her. Upon hearing what had happened to her family, he broke down saying over and over again: "I'm sorry.... I'm so sorry.... I'm sorry".
President Richard Nixon in his resignation speech said, "I regret deeply any injuries that may have been done in the course of events that have led to this decision. I would say only that if some of my judgments were wrong, and some were wrong, they were made in what I believed at the time to be in the best interest of the nation."
Do each of the above examples represent an apology? Why? Why not? Is one more effective than the other? How can we tell? Just what exactly is an apology?
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Interesting stuff. I think the author gets a little carried away with the awesome healing powers of those three little words, but it's still intriguing, taking apart something that we normally take for granted. It's like analysing humour, you know? Normally you wouldn't even think of doing it, but it's pretty cool when you do.
So in the midst of this, Sarah sends me this link:
Sorry Everybody.
It's... yeah. I don't know what to think of it. I mean, it's beautiful and sad and rather impressive, and the sentiments expressed are heartfelt and touching and occasionally hilarious. But... ::helpless shrug::. Why is it these people apologizing? Why do they feel they need to? What does it mean? What should the rest of us feel?
I feel like I felt when I saw [name escapes me]'s lj icon, with an American flag waving in the wind and the words "Proud AND Ashamed" on it. That nobody should have to feel like that about their own country. It's just wrong.
Anyway. Back to work.
Later Edit: OK, mood-icon whine again. I love my little bubble-dude, but it seems like the default expression for most emotions is various degrees of bummed out. I'm feeling "contemplative," but not necessarily in a bad way. My icon dude, OTOH, looks like he's contemplating suicide.
::poke poke:: Cheer up, buddy. Don't be soblue sad.
Rev. John Plummer was a pilot in Vietnam who called for an air strike on the village of Trang Bang. Twice, before acting, he was assured there were no civilians in the area. Later, he saw the Pulitzer prize-winning photo of nine-year-old Phan Thi Kim Phuc running from Trang Bang naked and horribly burned by napalm, and was tortured by "the realization that it was I who was responsible for her injuries."
Years of torment ensued as he silently endured his guilt, finding no way to express his remorse. Then he saw a story that the girl was living in Toronto and would attend a Veterans Day observance at the Vietnam Veterans Memorial in Washington. He felt compelled to see her. Upon hearing what had happened to her family, he broke down saying over and over again: "I'm sorry.... I'm so sorry.... I'm sorry".
President Richard Nixon in his resignation speech said, "I regret deeply any injuries that may have been done in the course of events that have led to this decision. I would say only that if some of my judgments were wrong, and some were wrong, they were made in what I believed at the time to be in the best interest of the nation."
Do each of the above examples represent an apology? Why? Why not? Is one more effective than the other? How can we tell? Just what exactly is an apology?
Interesting stuff. I think the author gets a little carried away with the awesome healing powers of those three little words, but it's still intriguing, taking apart something that we normally take for granted. It's like analysing humour, you know? Normally you wouldn't even think of doing it, but it's pretty cool when you do.
So in the midst of this, Sarah sends me this link:
Sorry Everybody.
It's... yeah. I don't know what to think of it. I mean, it's beautiful and sad and rather impressive, and the sentiments expressed are heartfelt and touching and occasionally hilarious. But... ::helpless shrug::. Why is it these people apologizing? Why do they feel they need to? What does it mean? What should the rest of us feel?
I feel like I felt when I saw [name escapes me]'s lj icon, with an American flag waving in the wind and the words "Proud AND Ashamed" on it. That nobody should have to feel like that about their own country. It's just wrong.
Anyway. Back to work.
Later Edit: OK, mood-icon whine again. I love my little bubble-dude, but it seems like the default expression for most emotions is various degrees of bummed out. I'm feeling "contemplative," but not necessarily in a bad way. My icon dude, OTOH, looks like he's contemplating suicide.
::poke poke:: Cheer up, buddy. Don't be so
