ciroccoj | early morning musings

Woke up at 4:15 with back pain and was unable to go back to sleep because what feels OK for my back feels awful for the incision, and vice versa. So here I am, two hours later, having given up on night-time sleep and hoping to take a nap sometime today.

I'll have to try to work that in with seeing my mom too. Yesterday was my first full day home, and I didn't do much. Felt OK by the end of the day - felt like I could keep the kids busy and maybe read to them and do Daniel's J'Aime lire homework with him while Chris got dinner ready. This was working fine until my mom and Guy showed up unexpectedly. Which was rather mortifying. My mother is an excellent housekeeper - even her towels are ironed before being put away in perfect colour-coded order. Chris and I try, but we're not exactly Martha Stewart in the best of times. And right now, with me in the hospital and Chris alone with the boys for the whole weekend and then me alone in the house under strict orders to not do anything? Did not leave our house in the best condition. Toys and books scattered on the floor, counters unwiped, pile of random papers and mending on the coffee table, etc etc. My mother normally winces at my house even after I've been cleaning for three hours straight; I can't imagine what she thought of it yesterday.

Anyway, I was rather horrified as well as annoyed at her for showing up unexpectedly, and exhausted trying to keep her and Guy entertained while Chris cooked and the boys ran around. Didn't read to them, didn't finish Daniel's J'Aime lire.

They were here for about an hour or so, and after they left I thought about what had happened, and how she's doing. She's going in for her (hopefully) final and worst treatment this Thursday. She's going to be in treatment every day for over a week, and will probably need to be hospitalized at some point during that period. They're going to basically kill off her entire immune system, take her to the edge of death, then put back the bone marrow she donated a few weeks ago and hope that brings her back. We're not sure she'll come out of this one.

So probably after Thursday I won't be able to visit with her for a long, long time. She'll be in no shape to be around anybody except Guy. So I can probably manage to go over to her house today and tomorrow and keep her company while I can.