ciroccoj | Back to reality

Sarah, Rainer, Sandra and Matthias have left the building. Oddly, a visit that was 6 days long felt waay too short for me. We'll have to figure out a way to get together next summer. Maybe at a camping spot between Brandon and Ottawa.

Chris is going back to work in a few minutes, and my aunt Gilda is supposedly landing at Ottawa Airport right about now. So my plan is to shower, call my mom's house, and then get over there. Hopefully walking, unless it rains.

***
Got a reprieve of sorts yesterday. After sleeping through most of Saturday and Sunday, my mother woke up yesterday morning and stayed awake and relatively alert until about 3, when she went to sleep for the rest of the day. She was talking a little bit, smiling, and able to follow conversations.

I had been trying to reconcile myself to never being able to talk to her again, since the doctor had said that she would probably die soon and not wake up before that. I had thought the rest of us would take turns sitting next to her bed as she slept, occasionally seeing her open her eyes, until she was gone.

But yesterday the doctor said that it was possible she might have 'awake' and 'asleep' days a few more times before dying. She said it looked like the lack of consciousness the last few days was caused by too pressure from liquid in her brain, and that since my mother had been mostly unable to drink for more than a day, she had become dehydrated and the pressure had eased, allowing her to wake up. The doctor said that my mom might have a few days like that - awake and drinking, followed by asleep and not drinking, followed by awake and drinking.

So. I hope that if she dies soon we'll all be able to just be grateful that we got yesterday with her. Otherwise, I hope she can be awake a few more times - at least long enough for the kids to say goodbye to her. In either case, I hope she has as little pain as possible.