Morning flotsam

First off, here's what Chris got when he did the quiz:

You are The Amazing Maleeni!!!!! You are a murder
mystery in the making... you use unusual tricks
to get away with robbing banks.


What Funny Episode of X-files are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Read an interesting article on Yahoo news today: ( People the world over wish upon the same stars )

And now, because my life is just this exciting: ( today's work menu )

Later Edit: Oh and I had a weird little prison flashback this morning. Walking to the law building, I looked up and a guy in dark jeans, pine green jacket, and white running shoes was walking in front of me. Looked exactly like the Kingston Pen inmate uniform from when I worked there. I swear I almost ran ahead of him so I could turn and look for his name & number ID label on the front of his jacket. Weird.

Even Later Edit: I am so bored, I think I just might cry.

anger issues

I think it was bear who wrote an entry a long, long time ago stating that really, nobody can quite get to you like your parents.

Just came back from seeing my mom and Guy, who came back from a six-week trip Chile yesterday. Overall, a nice visit, and I'm glad she and Guy had a nice time. Glad to catch up on news of La Familia. However... one thing she said is just eating away at me, and I have a feeling will probably keep me up for a bit tonight.

I have two cousins, Felipe and Loredana, who are both in medical school. Felipe just turned 23, Loly is 21. Felipe has mostly finished his schooling (apparently they go straight to Med school there, none of this "completing at least one undergrad degree" that's almost required here unless you're some kind of genius).

Anyway, my mother told me Felipe is now going to start his internship. He'll do two years before being a regular doctor. "And," she said, smiling slightly, "When Chris complains about his residency? Tell him Felipe is paying for rent, and food, and tuition. He works all day, and he's not even getting paid anything." And she sat back, with a 'so there' look on her face.

::deep breath::

For the record, Chris does not complain. Not to my mother, anyway. No, this was aimed quite directly at me, because I'm the one who does (or rather, did) complain bitterly about Chris' residency to her. Until I finally got tired of her replying with either a dismissive, "Well, it's like any profession, really" or with her patented "I don't approve of this whining so I'll just be totally silent and unresponsive until you get yourself together and cut it out" look.

So why is this making me fume and utterly blotting out the nice time we had?

Because frankly I feel like killing her right now.

First off, not to put Felipe down or anything, but I'd say there's a bit of a difference between spending 8 v. 4 years in school before being a resident. And secondly, (and this is the part that burns) what she's pointing out about poor Felipe, who has to work all day and not even get paid for it? And in fact, has to actually pay TUITION, god forbid, while he's working, the poor dear? (with a lovely subtext of You think you had it bad, well here's somebody who's really suffering and you don't see them complain, do you?)

CHRIS DID THAT FOR 18 FUCKING MONTHS. WORKING 80-120 HOURS A WEEK. WHILE PAYING ROUGHLY $6,000 FOR THE PRIVILEGE. WHICH SHE WOULD HAVE HEARD, HAD SHE BOTHERED TO LISTEN TO A WORD I SAID DURING THOSE 18 MONTHS INSTEAD OF PROJECTING DISAPPROVAL BECAUSE I WAS DARING TO WHINE ABOUT IT.

Also? While Chris was working those hours and paying for it, I was working fulltime and taking care of Daniel, who was 2-3 years old. I went through pregnancy, childbirth, nursing difficulties with Justin, a whalloping depression, and the joy of trying to sell our house with a 3-yr old and a newborn and no partner in sight.

Yes, I'm so sorry, I did whine. To my mother, because there was nobody else to talk to about any of it. And what a great source of support she was. Such great support, as a matter of fact, that I finally vowed that even if there was nobody else to talk to about any of my particular troubles, I still wouldn't tell her about them. Because she invariably makes them worse - I not only deal with whatever is troubling me, I also deal with her disappointment at my weakness and impatience at my complaining.

So, the depression I've gone through this year? Chris' brain damage? My marital troubles with Chris? Leslie's death? Todd and Susan's woes? She doesn't know about any of it, and she never will. She knows about the fibroid and hospitalization, but only because she took care of my kids while I was in the hospital. Otherwise, as far as she knows, everything is peachy rosy wonderful. Because she just can't handle anything less from me.

OK. On that cheery note, I'm going to go put my kids to bed and try as much as I can to not allow my fury at my mother to taint their bedtime.