The dairk syde o' Rabbie Burns

[ciroccoj]

Man, some days I'm absolutely sure that in my previous incarnation, I was a twelve-year-old boy :D :D

Got this forward from my father, to share with my kids:
Address Tae a Fart

Oh what a sleekit horrible beastie
lurks in yer belly efter the feastie
As ye sit doon amongst yer kin
There sterts tae stir an enormous win'
The neeps an' tatties an' mushy peas
Stert workin like a gentle breeze

But soon the puddin' wi' the sonsie face
Will have ye blawin' a' ower the place
Nae matter whit the dae ye dae
A'bodys gonnae have tae pay
Even if ye try tae stifle
It's like a bullet oot o' a rifle

Hawd yer bum tight tae the chair
Tae try an' stop the leakin' air
Shift yersel fae cheek tae cheek
Pray tae God it disnae reek
But aw yer efforts gan asunder
Oot it comes like a clap o' thunder

Ricochets aroon' the room
Michty me! A sonic boom
Ach ma Lard, it fairly reeks
Hope I huvnae poop’t my breeks
Tae the bog I'd better scurry
Ach, whit the dae, it's no ma worry

A'body roon aboot me chokin'
Yin or twa were nearly bokin'
I'll feel better for a while
Cannae help but raise a smile
Wis him! I shout with accusin'glower
Alas! Too late! He's just keeled ower

Ye dirty bugger, they shout an' stare
A didnae feel welcome ony mair
Where e're ye be let yer wind gan free
Sounds just like the job for me
Whit a fuss at Rabbie's party
Ower the sake o' one wee farty

Comments

[linaelyn.livejournal.com]

Gibbs Approves.

[tudorlady.livejournal.com]

I'm crude enough to laugh at this. (Seriously, I have a terrible affinity for rude songs. Ask me about 'Greensleaze' - the biker version of Greensleeves - sometime.)

But then, I think my guardian angel was a frat boy before - well, before he got assigned to me.