busy busy burbling (and a rambling rant)
Oct. 28th, 2003 02:49 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ciroccoj::happy sigh::
Tuesday is my "Good MORNING!! How would you like to start off the day with 3 straight hours of Contracts and PROPERTY?!" day.
Which is normally enough, in and of itself, to put me in a pissy mood. And yet it's been a good day anyway :)
For one thing, Chris came in to my Property class, where our prof was wrapping up IP, and was pretty interested in it. Then we had lunch together, then went to the Rideau Centre, went to the Body Shop, Mrs. Tiggy-Winkles, Chapter's, and finished off the afternoon with an incredible sushi in the Rideau Centre food court. It was like a date, in the middle of the day.
Partway through the date I realized how nice it was to feel energetic and interested in stuff. And capable of doing things, where I've felt helpless and overwhelmed for so long. Looking back on lj entries, there's quite a few "accomplished" mood icons, because I can look back on my day and realize I've actually achieved quite a bit.
And I can look forward to being at home for the rest of the afternoon and getting stuff done - doing the second coat of paint in the boys' room, finishing some readings, laundry, finishing the costumes, etc. Without having to drag myself to do any of it. It's a wonderful feeling.
On the not so wonderful side, I've been reminded yet again of why me and online discussion groups just don't mix.
Very polite comment from one of the moderators on the Alhena discussion that I got bitchy in the other day, which pretty much cemented my nebulous wish not to return to the board. It's a nice place, and I've had fun, and there's plenty of very nice people there, but I've been getting increasingly disturbed by the racism and ignorance of some of the frequent posters and... enough. Don't have time to deal with this kind of thing.
What I found particularly interesting was that the comment had to do with "off-topic"-ness. A general discussion had turned political, I took issue with some of the political opinions, was told that my answer was off-topic (because apparently the initial opinion was not), and... yeah.
And one of the things that really made me think was in response to me saying that "... mostly I'm angry that this keeps coming up, in topic after topic, and nobody says anything about it. Because bringing up the 'fact' that whites, men, etc are oppressed is 'on-topic'. But arguing against it is not."
The response was, "The lack of response to comments briefly made in various threads probably is to respect the thread originator in keeping the thread on-topic, and not because anyone agrees or disagrees with the comment made. But it also might indicate the others didn't feel strongly enough about the topic to put forth the effort for a whole new thread."
Hm. That's food for thought. And she's probably right. Nobody else does seem to find those kinds of statements offensive, if the utter lack of response is any indicator. I'm not sure "wishing to respect the moderator's opinions" is a reason, because frankly... a whole heck of a lot of discussions end up having little or nothing to do with the original thread, and people don't seem to mind.
Another thing that made me think: I was quite aware that I was getting rather more personal than I usually get in these discussions, because frankly I was sick of (trying to) take the high road. Other posters regularly put out statements like... well, like, "Nor is now the time for me to bring up that the topic of blacks getting reparations for slavery is the biggest load of shit I've ever seen attempted to be shoveled." Somehow, they're not seen as "personal". Even though many of them, frankly, have hurt or insulted me personally, because I happen to believe in the political stance being ridiculed. But when I turned it around and commented that I felt those statements showed a remarkable ignorance, that was seen as personal.
Interesting. "Focussing on racism all the time is a load of shit" = not personal. "Thinking that focussing on racism is a load of shit is ignorant" = personal. I see.
Anyway. Link to the whole sorry discussion here. It started innocently enough as a discussion about Dr. Skoda's comment on L&O that "male opinions can't be expressed ... their visceral behavior is no longer tolerated".
BTW, if anybody thinks I'm saying this is a bad board, I'm not. I know I've expressed frustration about it before, but really - it's fine, mostly. There's interesting discussion about Law & Order, politics, current events, even (a teeny bit) of fanfic. If anybody bothers to follow the link, take a look around. It's a cool board, mostly, especially if you're just lurking.
It's just not for me. I don't have the time.
Well. That was longer than I expected. Must go paint room now, get back to happy thoughts :)
Tuesday is my "Good MORNING!! How would you like to start off the day with 3 straight hours of Contracts and PROPERTY?!" day.
Which is normally enough, in and of itself, to put me in a pissy mood. And yet it's been a good day anyway :)
For one thing, Chris came in to my Property class, where our prof was wrapping up IP, and was pretty interested in it. Then we had lunch together, then went to the Rideau Centre, went to the Body Shop, Mrs. Tiggy-Winkles, Chapter's, and finished off the afternoon with an incredible sushi in the Rideau Centre food court. It was like a date, in the middle of the day.
Partway through the date I realized how nice it was to feel energetic and interested in stuff. And capable of doing things, where I've felt helpless and overwhelmed for so long. Looking back on lj entries, there's quite a few "accomplished" mood icons, because I can look back on my day and realize I've actually achieved quite a bit.
And I can look forward to being at home for the rest of the afternoon and getting stuff done - doing the second coat of paint in the boys' room, finishing some readings, laundry, finishing the costumes, etc. Without having to drag myself to do any of it. It's a wonderful feeling.
On the not so wonderful side, I've been reminded yet again of why me and online discussion groups just don't mix.
Very polite comment from one of the moderators on the Alhena discussion that I got bitchy in the other day, which pretty much cemented my nebulous wish not to return to the board. It's a nice place, and I've had fun, and there's plenty of very nice people there, but I've been getting increasingly disturbed by the racism and ignorance of some of the frequent posters and... enough. Don't have time to deal with this kind of thing.
What I found particularly interesting was that the comment had to do with "off-topic"-ness. A general discussion had turned political, I took issue with some of the political opinions, was told that my answer was off-topic (because apparently the initial opinion was not), and... yeah.
And one of the things that really made me think was in response to me saying that "... mostly I'm angry that this keeps coming up, in topic after topic, and nobody says anything about it. Because bringing up the 'fact' that whites, men, etc are oppressed is 'on-topic'. But arguing against it is not."
The response was, "The lack of response to comments briefly made in various threads probably is to respect the thread originator in keeping the thread on-topic, and not because anyone agrees or disagrees with the comment made. But it also might indicate the others didn't feel strongly enough about the topic to put forth the effort for a whole new thread."
Hm. That's food for thought. And she's probably right. Nobody else does seem to find those kinds of statements offensive, if the utter lack of response is any indicator. I'm not sure "wishing to respect the moderator's opinions" is a reason, because frankly... a whole heck of a lot of discussions end up having little or nothing to do with the original thread, and people don't seem to mind.
Another thing that made me think: I was quite aware that I was getting rather more personal than I usually get in these discussions, because frankly I was sick of (trying to) take the high road. Other posters regularly put out statements like... well, like, "Nor is now the time for me to bring up that the topic of blacks getting reparations for slavery is the biggest load of shit I've ever seen attempted to be shoveled." Somehow, they're not seen as "personal". Even though many of them, frankly, have hurt or insulted me personally, because I happen to believe in the political stance being ridiculed. But when I turned it around and commented that I felt those statements showed a remarkable ignorance, that was seen as personal.
Interesting. "Focussing on racism all the time is a load of shit" = not personal. "Thinking that focussing on racism is a load of shit is ignorant" = personal. I see.
Anyway. Link to the whole sorry discussion here. It started innocently enough as a discussion about Dr. Skoda's comment on L&O that "male opinions can't be expressed ... their visceral behavior is no longer tolerated".
BTW, if anybody thinks I'm saying this is a bad board, I'm not. I know I've expressed frustration about it before, but really - it's fine, mostly. There's interesting discussion about Law & Order, politics, current events, even (a teeny bit) of fanfic. If anybody bothers to follow the link, take a look around. It's a cool board, mostly, especially if you're just lurking.
It's just not for me. I don't have the time.
Well. That was longer than I expected. Must go paint room now, get back to happy thoughts :)
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2003-10-28 02:31 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-10-28 03:05 pm (UTC)And frankly, some of my impatience may be due to the hormones I'm on ;). I find I'm not as able to step back and let annoying things roll off my back - comments and situations that would normally make me just roll my eyes and sigh have me seeing red instead. Best to get away from irritating things for a good, long time - like, say, May, when I'll presumably be off this stuff.
If I go off them. Irritability aside, I'm getting a crapload of stuff done, and mostly having a great time. If this keeps up, I may never go off them ;)
no subject
Date: 2003-10-28 03:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-10-28 02:39 pm (UTC)Anyway, I'd gotten on the wrong end of a few nasty discussions at Mike's (having been brought up in Australia, I can't actually see how anyone can support the death penalty), but was willing to put up with it for the core group of people. Once Mike's closed, that was it. We scattered to the four winds... I'd ask if Chris Morris (or K_Landsurvey) had been on the board you speak of, but he wouldn't have put up with that crap any longer than you have, so I doubt he's there.
no subject
Date: 2003-10-28 05:17 pm (UTC)Actually, the ultra-conservative part didn't bother me so much per se. I had a couple of really good discussions with some people with whom I vehemently disagreed, but... they were respectful discussions. You know when you were mentioning the whole Church thing about "accepting that people can hold different opinions with integrity"? There were quite a few people who seemed quite able to do that. One of the most enjoyable exchanges I had was actually with somebody who was very much opposed to gay marriage (!). It was frustrating that she held that position, because I kept thinking, "But you're bright. And polite. And thoughtful. And respectful. And WRONG!" ;)
But yeah, it was an exchange of ideas and at the end we agreed to disagree but I think we'd both learned something from each other. I know I'd learned from her, at least.
There was another poster from Texas who made me cringe half the time because she was... well, stereotypically Texan (pro-DP, anti-gun control, etc), but again... thoughtful. Respectful. Not holding her opinions out of sheer pigheaded idiocy, but out of intelligent examination of the world around her and a thoughtful conclusion that just happened to be different from mine. She actually changed my mind about a few things, and made me at least consider some other things in a different light.
And it seemed to me that most people there were like that.
But then there were the (very) few that said things with no thought behind them, with nothing but contempt for anybody with a different point of view, with the most stereotypical "typical" American ignorance and self-centredness that I actually don't see in most Americans I know... and it just got to be too much.
I mean, when you find yourself thinking, "And this is why the world hates America..." it's time to leave. I don't like feeling like that. I don't feel like that. And right now... nah. Not a good time in my life to have those kinds of feelings. I'm trying to avoid bad karma ;)
no subject
Date: 2003-10-28 05:33 pm (UTC)(That said -- what's the point of being neutral if they're just going to bomb you anyway?!?! I'm still in shock over the bombing of the ICRC office in Iraq. I mean...the idiocy of it!)
Oh - and I'm going to delete the duplicate of my previous comment. No idea what LJ is doing to me today...
no subject
Date: 2003-10-28 05:54 pm (UTC)::gagging::
Times like this, I keep reminding myself that America doesn't have the monopoly on that kind of thing. Eg, during the SARS crisis, Toronto Mayor Mel Lastman was quoted grumbling something like, "The World Health Organization puts Toronto on their Do Not Travel Advisory... who the hell are these people? Who do they think they are? I've sure never heard of them!"
::Cirocco blushing furiously with acute embarrassment and a fervent desire that the remark doesn't make it to world press, thinking "That's not something to brag about, Mel..."::
Oh - and I'm going to delete the duplicate of my previous comment. No idea what LJ is doing to me today...
Don't get me started on lj. It posted 8 copies of my post yesterday. Then it wouldn't let me delete them. Arg!
::don'tcomplainit'safreeservicedon'tcomplainit'safreeservicedon'tcomplainit'safreeservice::
By the way, I tried to delete your duplicate post and it asked me if I was sure about deleting, then asked if I wanted to make sure you never posted a comment to my lj again. !!!
I quickly backed out of that one, not knowing what would happen if I continued. The way lj's behaving the last couple of days, I was worried it would maybe delete your entire database or something ;)
BTW, no I didn't see any K_Landsurvey, but was he Australian? Because I went to high school with a Chris Morris. I'm sure the name's as common as John Smith, but wouldn't it be funny if it was the same guy ;)
no subject
Date: 2003-10-28 06:16 pm (UTC)Gah...
I tried to delete your duplicate post and it asked me if I was sure about deleting, then asked if I wanted to make sure you never posted a comment to my lj again. !!!
LOL! And I'm not sure I don't share your concern with the way LJ's been acting and its possible accidental deletions as a result...
And I don't think we're talking about the same Chris Morris. This guy was British-American, brought up in Buckinghamshire. At the time of Mike's (1999) he was teaching English Lit at a University in Prague, but making his summer base in Crete. Ah, to be European.