UGH

[ciroccoj]

I think I just really ticked off the lady on the phone for CapitalOne, by asking her to repeat herself about twenty times. I just couldn't understand a word she was saying. She kept getting louder and louder, and I kept telling her, "I can hear you just fine; I just can't understand what you're saying. Please don't speak louder; just slow down."

I hate being one of those people who feigns incomprehension because somebody else has a bit of an accent. My parents have accents in English; most of my friends growing up had parents with fairly thick accents; I've travelled around the world and can understand every variety of English (other than Singlish), most French (except, ironically, rural Quebecois), and almost every Spanish dialect I've ever heard. Except for the Spanish spoken by this guy I knew at Queen's, who spoke Spain Spanish, very softly, in the cafeteria, under a mustache, and usually with his hand in front of his mouth. And usually spoke it only to me, in an attempt to share "Latin humour," which I mostly really didn't get, and which seemed to consist mostly of Spain-Spanish puns I couldn't understand, and rather stupid sexism that was more offensive for its stupidity than its sexism.

Anyway. I get accents. I just didn't get what this woman was saying.

"So juwanna che debalan sonjorr carannju donnavde securityco?"

??!!

"I'm sorry, could you repeat that please?"

"Juwanna che de balans onjorrcar annju donnav de securityco?"

"I want to do something, and I don't have the security code?"

"Jes. Juwanna chedebalans on jorr car--"

"Do I want to check the balance on my card?"

"Jes."

"Yes! Yes, that's what I want to do."

"Anju donnavde security--"

"And I don't have the security code! Yes, that's it! I want to check the balance on my card, and I don't have the security code."

"Okeiju jassavtu gweijussa momen, aigedde proper scrin."

"You'll get the proper screen?"

"Wad?"

"I'm sorry, I couldn't understand what you said before that."

"JUJASSAVTUGWEI--"

"Please don't shout, I'm sorry, I couldn't understand what you said before the proper screen part."

"Okei ai goddescrin."

"OK, you got the screen?"

"JES."

Long story short, my wallet has not been stolen. Unless it was stolen three days ago and the thief used it to purchase "TERRYTREE SISSTIN" ($33.16) worth of groceries, at my grocery store. I met a lot of thieves in prison, and I gotta say, by and large they weren't big on frugality and restraint.

Unfortunately, I still don't have my wallet. ::sigh::

Also, I believe the cat just peed. Damn.

Comments

;)

[twistedm.livejournal.com]

you do realize the phrase "I met a lot of thieves in prison" could easily be misunderstood?

Re: ;)

[ciroccoj.livejournal.com]

LOL yeah, I suppose to :D :D

[tudorlady.livejournal.com]

You guys get that too? I thought you'd just have to put up with incomprehensible Quebecois accents. (Only slightly bitter because I'm bilingual in French rather than what they need down here, which is either Spanish, Russian, or Vietnamese. This has kept me out of consideration for more than a couple of jobs.)

[ciroccoj.livejournal.com]

You guys get that too? I thought you'd just have to put up with incomprehensible Quebecois accents.
Nope, we often get Indian/Pakistani accents over the phone - I think a lot of companies farm off customer service to India. This lady didn't sound Indian/Pakistani. I don't know what she sounded like... maybe Middle Eastern-ish? Or Southeast Asian? I know it wasn't Hispanic, despite the 'y' => 'j' and a few other normally Hispanic accent traits. I know because if she had sounded Hispanic, I would've asked her to speak Spanish at some point and maybe we could've concluded our business a lot faster.

(Only slightly bitter because I'm bilingual in French rather than what they need down here, which is either Spanish, Russian, or Vietnamese. This has kept me out of consideration for more than a couple of jobs.)
Russian? Wow. Haven't heard of that one. I'd be right out of luck, as the only Russian I know is Nyet, Pravda, Glasnost, and Stolichnaya ;)

French tends to be a pretty big thing here in Eastern Ontario, but it really depends on where you are. Apparently not knowing French isn't a big career barrier in Alberta or Saskatchewan or BC, but knowing Punjabi will take you far in Vancouver. Dunno if that's actual fact, or just anecdotal.

[leaper182.livejournal.com]

From the clues you've included in the post and in your reply to tudorlady, I'm thinking that you were dealing with someone from India, or around that geographic area? I say this because we've had to deal with a woman at the library where I work for the past few months or so -- she keeps filling out applications for hospital work, and her accent sounds like what you've described, though hers is a bit more understandable. Hrm.